Ability
by Butterfly Hippie
Summary: Prequel to SCF. Heather's adventures on the Ability with her friends teach her some things about life. Better than it sounds. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_...Oh, did I tell you that a government official called me? He wants **me** to be the captain of an all-disabled starship, called the **Ability**. He said if I knew anybody to be the first officer that would be great. I said I knew the perfect woman: you! We are going to have so much fun together, exploring the galaxy..._

Heather Martinez could read no further. She was too excited. Jumping up from her place at her nicely carved wooden desk, she squealed and whirled around, not caring who heard her. Who would, anyway? She lived alone, with nobody for company, unless you counted her cat, Snickers, as company. She had had Snickers ever since she had moved out of her parents' house, years ago. Being the queen sweet-tooth she was, Heather thought it was only natural to name the cat after her favorite candy bar. At the moment, Snickers watched her curiously from his spot on the bed, his green eyes watching his mistress as she danced around the room. The orange striped cat clashed violently with the royal blue bedspread and pillowcase. Finally, Snickers let out a contented purr and closed his eyes to sleep.

As she spun, Heather crashed into the desk, and grabbed the desk leg to keep herself from falling. The movement shook the desk slightly and the letter fluttered to the floor.

The letter was from Heather's best friend, Kathleen Mararri. Heather and Kathleen had known each other since Heather was twelve, and Kathleen eleven. They had been on the same handicapped baseball team together, and had immediately bonded over the fact that they both had cerebral palsy.

Cerebral palsy is a condition that occurs from some sort of brain damage at birth or soon after. In both Heather and Kathleen's cases, the brain damage occurred from lack of oxygen to the brain at birth, coupled with premature birth. It could cause a wide variety of problems, from bad balance to poor muscle control. It also had a wide range of severity-Heather was considered mild. She walked with one forearm crutch, although she didn't need it. She just found it came in handy for long walks, and if she had to stand for an extended period of time. It also helped her with her balance.

Kathleen was considered moderate to severe. She couldn't walk without the aid of a walker, and she usually used a power wheelchair to get around. Her abilities had improved somewhat since Heather had known her, but the CP would never go away.

Feeling suddenly tired, Heather sank down back into her desk chair, excitement still buzzing through her body. Her foot landed on the abandoned letter and she picked it up. She quickly read through the rest of it. One paragraph in particular caught her eye.

_It won't be completely disabled crew, _Kat had written. _There will be a few able-bodied officers who've grown up around disability and "get it". Such as our communications officer. I was thinking of your sister-if she's interested in the job._

Heather's older sister, Lillian, was a communications genius. She was fluent in about ten languages, and she could squeak by just enough to be understood on about five others. Her language knowledge included everything from Spanish and French, to Vulcan and Klingon. She was currently working as a speech therapist at the same school that Heather taught at. This school was Henry Viscardi, a school for physically challenged children. The school was extremely old-it had first started out back in the mid 20th century. Since then, the school had evolved into the HVS that Heather knew and loved. Many of her friends had gone to HVS as children, though she had not. Some of them were now working there. _Wait. Teaching! What am I going to do about my job? _She had to talk to Kat about this. She wheeled around and quickly called up her instant-messaging program on her computer. Instant-messaging was very advanced in this century. People did not need to have individual screen names anymore. You just had to type in the person's name, and you were able to start a conversation with that person, with audio and visual. In minutes, Heather was staring into the face of her best friend on her monitor.

"Hey, Kat." _Kathleen's actually very pretty,_ Heather realized. Wavy blonde hair framed her freckled face, and her blue eyes stood out prominently in her thin face. Heather herself was pretty, with shoulder-length dirty blonde hair, usually pulled back into a ponytail. Her hazel eyes shone with eagerness at the thought of being on a mostly disabled starship. A few loose strands escaped from her ponytail as she talked, and she absent-mindedly pushed them back behind her ear, her gold hoop earrings catching the light.

"Hey, Heath." Kathleen answered, breaking into a wide grin. She was sitting, as usual, in her big, electric blue power wheelchair. She had had that wheelchair for a few years now, ever since she grew out of her old, out-of-date wheelchair from childhood. That wheelchair still sat in Kathleen's garage as an emergency chair, and also as a piece of memorabilia. In truth, Kat couldn't bear to get rid of it. It was too special.

"I got your letter." Heather continued. "It sounds awesome. But what about my teaching? And Lil's work? We can't just drop all of that like a hot potato, can we?"

"Well, if you want to continue teaching and not do the mission, I guess that's OK." Kathleen sounded reluctant. "But won't it be much more fun being out in uncharted space with your best friends?"

It did sound good, Heather had to admit. And she hadn't seen Kathleen or her other friends for ages.

"Alright. I'll do it. Teaching was getting a bit tedious, anyway!"

"Yesss!" Kathleen cheered. "Did you ask Lillian if she wants to do it yet?" Heather shook her head.

"Not yet. Do you want to do three-way?" Kathleen nodded and Heather quickly keyed in her sister's name and set it up so the three girls could talk together. A minute later, Lillian's face, curly brown hair cascading over her shoulders, appeared on the monitor beside Kathleen.

"Hey, Heath. Hey, Kathleen. What's up?" Heather looked over at her friend.

"You wanna ask her?" Kat nodded and proceeded to explain the situation to Lillian. When she finished, Lil looked thoughtful.

"So I'd be one of the only able-bodied officers on the ship?" Heather exchanged uncomfortable glances with Kathleen.

"Well...yeah."

"But what about my work?" Heather took charge on this one.

"Lil, I don't like giving up my teaching work either. But this is a completely new experience, a new adventure. We could be missing out on something great. And you've always wanted to explore space.

"Yeah, when I was ten. I'm twenty-nine now. I have other priorities. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do." Lillian made to close the connection, but Heather stopped her.

"Wait." Lillian paused.

"Lilly, where else are we going to get a communications officer as great as you? And you know all the deep space languages, it would be perfect!" Now Heather's voice became quieter.

"Please Lilly. We need you." Lillian thought it over. _Why the hell does Heath always get me into these things?_ _I like my job. I like the way I'm living. And she expects me to drop it all for some stupid starship?_

_But then again, I **do**__kind of want to see what it's like out there..._Her sister's voice cut into her thoughts again.

"Please, Lilly?" Slowly, Lillian's resistance faded away. _It would be cool..._

"Fine. I'll do it."

"Yes!" Kathleen and Heather cheered together. Lillian could only roll her eyes and think: _What the hell have I gotten myself into?_

Six months later, the crew of the _Ability_ gathered in Cape Canaveral, Florida to board the ship and go off to uncharted space. Heather was picking her way through the crowd, searching out old friends and making some new while Kathleen trailed along behind her. After all, as the captain and first officer, wasn't it their duty to get to know their crew? Heather wasn't sure. This was her first space mission, like it was for most of the crew. Many of these disabled men and women weren't sure if they could even join Starfleet, let alone be on a starship. Many of them could not toilet themselves, and some couldn't even feed themselves. For them, it was a dream come true.

Heather was wending her way through the crowd and trying not to fall over when someone prodded her hard in the back. She whirled around to yell at the offender and was met with the grinning face of Bridget McLane.

"Bridget! Don't _do_ that!" Heather exclaimed with an easy smile. Bridget was also one of her childhood best friends. A stroke in infancy had left her basically paralyzed on the right side of her body, and she used one crutch sometimes, just like Heather. Bridget loved proving people wrong about her, she was one of those disabled people who would rather live among "normal" people and prove that she was capable, rather than live among disabled people and be able to _be_ disabled comfortably. Heather supposed it was a matter of opinion; she herself would rather be immersed in the disability culture, which she was. Bridget acted frequently in amateur plays and musicals. Her dream was to be an actress on Broadway someday. That dream would have to be put on hold for now.

"Where's Maureen?" she asked, looking around. Lt. Maureen Lamore was the final member of the foursome. Together, the four had met on their baseball team for kids with disabilities and become so close, they were almost like sisters. And they stayed that way, even as each girl went their separate ways.

"Right here." said a voice from behind them. Heather twisted around to see Maureen, precariously balancing on her two trademark purplish-pink forearm crutches. Maureen had moderate cerebral palsy, somewhere in the middle of Heather's and Kathleen's. She used the forearm crutches to walk, although she could walk extremely short distances without them. Maureen was the most logical out of the group; indeed her logic could sometimes be borderline Vulcan-esque. Heather was almost convinced that Maureen had to have some Vulcan blood in her, somewhere. But Maureen always insisted that she was sure that she was completely, 100 human. Maureen was also the quietest of the group, and she did more thinking than talking. The other three girls talked a lot more than they thought. But together, the four girls were an unstoppable force, an incredible friendship. Their friendship was already strengthened beyond any "normal" friendship; now it would get the ultimate test, being on a starship together for three years, at least.

The four girls embraced. _It's been so long since we've seen each other_, mused Heather. _Yet, I think that's just made us closer. _It was a minute before she realized that they were somewhat tangled in the group hug position, and there didn't seem to be a way to get out of it. Arms were tangled together, crutches knocked into each other, and Heather was very sure that if they didn't get out of this group hug, she was going to fall on her butt. And it would hurt. Just then, there was a ripple in the crowd of people, and the _Ability_'s reluctant communications officer pushed through, a large duffel bag slung over her shoulder.

"What are you two doing?" she questioned, surveying the scene with disdain. It wasn't rare to find her sister and friends tangled in some sort of absurd position, but she had to admit that this one took the cake.

"What does it look like we're doing?" Heather managed, despite the fact that Bridget's overly strong arm was nearly choking her. Lillian raised an eyebrow.

"It looks like you're doing some sort of twisted circle dance." she responded, her eyes never leaving the group.

"Well, that's not it. It's a group hug." Heather replied, somewhat annoyed. Her nerves were already on edge from being the first officer on a starship; having her big sister make her feel stupid only made it worse.

"Well _excuse_ me for not recognizing it." Lillian shot back. Heather was about to retort when a voice piped up from inside the hug.

"Um, I hate to interrupt this session of _sisterly bonding_," Bridget interrupted, voice dripping with sarcasm. "But could someone please untangle us?" Lillian sighed, and without further ado, began to separate the mess of arms, legs and crutches. Just then, one of the engineers who had been checking the _Ability _for last-minute problems came up to the small group.

"Uh, Captain?" he asked. He reached out a tentative hand to tap Kathleen on the shoulder, then recoiled when she jumped.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" he said quickly. "Did I hurt you?" Kathleen gave him a strange look.

"Um. No." Kathleen turned back to her friends for a split second, giving them a plainly exasperated look. This guy was clearly one of those people who had absolutely _no_ idea how to act in front of a disabled person. He had probably never seen a disabled person in his life, and now the poor soul was around a whole crowd of them. Thank god he wasn't part of the crew. If Kathleen had had enough coordination to roll her eyes, she would have.

"Um. So yeah. I just, uh, wanted to let you know that, uh, we're ready to, uh, begin boarding the ship. Wh-when you're ready, that is." All the while, the engineer was backing steadily away from the group, clearly wanting to get as far away from the disabled population as possible.

"So, uh, I'll just, uh, be right over here. Uh, that is if you need me. Or anything." By now the poor man was so far away, he was half-shouting. As soon as he was out of earshot, all five girls burst out laughing.

"Oh, man." Heather gasped, wiping tears of laughter from her eyes. "This mission is definitely going to be interesting." And so the crew picked up their bags and started slowly towards the starship, and a very interesting journey.

A/N: Yay, I've finally finished the first chapter! This is a prequel to Set A Course For Freedom, but you don't necessarily have to read that to understand this. Although it might help. So, tell me what you think! Go ahead and review!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

That evening, after finding her way to her quarters, Heather flopped on her bed. She was exhausted. Learning your way around a starship wasn't easy, that's for sure. She had gotten lost at least twice, if not more. At the same time, it was exciting to finally be out in space. She'd never even dreamed that one day she'd be in space with some of her best friends in the world.

_So why do I feel so homesick?_ Heather wondered, and then it hit her like a ton a bricks. _I miss my job!_ she realized with a sudden understanding. _I miss teaching!_

Heather was an English teacher at Henry Viscardi, a school for physically handicapped kids. She had been teaching there for the last five or six years, ever since she got out of college. She was surprised that she had gotten the job there so quickly. She had heard that the waiting list was years long. But then again, she had written a five page letter to the school board explaining her situation. Maybe that had helped.

She began thinking of all the kids in her last period class-that was her favorite period of the day. All the kids in that class were extremely bright, and extremely good writers. Plus, that class was the class that Claire Ashlane and her best friend Lisa Wilter, were in. Claire and Lisa reminded Heather of herself and Kathleen at thirteen and fourteen. They even _looked_ a little like the way the girls had looked at their age. They talked constantly, when they weren't working. It was practically a mirror image, reminding Heather of her high school days.

Middle school had not been pleasant for Heather, and high school was, if possible, even worse. She had longed for a disabled environment, and craved the little time she got to spend with her disabled friends. She spent her days in lonely isolation, only coming out of her shell when she was at home or with her other handicapped friends.

Then she had gone to college and things had improved significantly. In college, no one made fun of you or excluded you because you were different. Plus, Heather had gone to a college with a large disabled population. Finally, she felt like she belonged. And then she had applied for the job at Henry Viscardi, and much to her surprise, actually got it. Working at Viscardi had been her childhood dream, and at long last, she was living it.

The night after her first day at HVS, Heather had called Kathleen to discuss how excited she was about the job.

"All throughout middle and high school, I always felt so lonely and out of place, like I didn't belong. Now, for one of the first times in my life, I feel like I finally belong."

Her comm badge beeped, startling her and jerking her out of her thoughts.

"Marrari to Martinez." Kathleen's voice echoed in the room. "Man, that's cool!" she giggled.

"Martinez here!" Heather responded, while suppressing a giggle of her own.

"I was wondering if you'd like to join me in the mess hall for dessert." Kat said. "I heard there's going to be a lot of junk food."

"Even candy?" asked Heather, with interest.

"Yes," laughed Kathleen. "Even candy." A grin spread across Heather's face. This was going to be fun.

"On my way." she responded.

_First, I have to get there. No easy task. I have no clue where the mess hall is._

Heather threaded her way through the desolate corridors, becoming more confused by the second. The corridors were pretty much deserted at this hour; most crew not on duty were in their quarters getting some rest and writing letters back home.

Heather stopped at the start of a corridor. The floor was wet and slippery, having just been mopped by...someone. _What imbecile would leave a wet floor for the __**physically disabled**__ crew of a starship?_ she fumed. Her balance wasn't good at the best of times, to avoid falling on a wet floor at this time seemed almost impossible. Slowly she started edging her way cautiously down the corridor, but it was no use. Halfway down, she fell, and landed hard on her hands and knees. She tried to get up, but each time she did, she only fell back down again. Now she was lying stuck, like a turtle, on her stomach, arms and legs splayed in all directions. _Shit_. It was either crawl down the rest of the corridor or call for help. She didn't like either choice. Although this was a mainly physically disabled crew, she was the first officer. She did NOT want to be perceived as helpless by the few able-bodied members of the crew. It was a silly, kind of irrational fear, but it been with her all throughout her life, and it always surfaced at times like these. She was debating her choices when a soft voice spoke above her.

"Well, well, well, looks like the first officer fell down on the job." said the voice, with a hint of sarcasm, but not malice. "Want some help?"

"No, I want to stay on the floor like an idiot." Heather snapped, angry and embarrassed at not having the coordination to get up on her own. "What do you _think_ I want?" Without a word, the speaker hauled Heather to her feet, and for the first time, Heather got a good look at her rescuer.

She was medium height, with short, angled red hair. Her green eyes looked shy and haunted by some unknown force. Her uniform indicated that she was an engineer. The pips on her collar told Heather that she was a cadet. She looked perfectly able-bodied, but Heather knew from experience not to judge on looks.

"T-thank you." Heather stammered, still humiliated at being found sprawled on the floor by someone she didn't know. And that was weird, because Heather knew almost all of the crewmembers on board. Her rescuer gave her a small smile.

"No problem." she answered softly, and for the first time, Heather noticed that she had a bit of a Southern accent. "Cadet Meagan McCormick, at your service." She gave a small salute, and without another word, turned and walked away.

_Well, that was strange, _Heather mused before continuing her search for the mess hall. By the time she found it, she had forgotten all about the mysterious and elusive Meagan.

The memory only resurfaced later that day. Heather was in a holosuite with Kathleen and Maureen and Bridget. Almost all of the crewmembers received physical therapy, and since they had no space for a therapist to stay, coupled with the lack of money to pay someone, one of the engineers had created three different therapy programs: one for physical therapy, one for occupational therapy, and one for speech therapy. They were proving to be very useful, especially since groups of friends could go in, activate the program, and have therapy together.

So, later that afternoon, the four senior officers went in to have physical therapy. _This particular engineer just shattered the stereotypes that disabled people can't be smart. _Heather mused. _ Especially since he only has control of his head. I'll have to remember to thank him later._ A voice interrupted her thoughts.

"This sure beats the old days where we did PT out of a closet, huh, Heath?" Kathleen asked with a grin.

"Definitely." Heather agreed. Kathleen was talking about their days in high school. Unfortunately, in their day, schools had given very little money for programs like physical and occupational therapy. So therapists had to find space wherever they could, including closets, locker rooms, and hallways. It always made for an interesting therapy experience.

This therapy suite was state-of-the art. Two yoga mats were stretched out on the floor, a therapy ball was in the corner, and several other therapy-related things surrounded them. Heather lay on a mat doing leg lifts while Kathleen and Bridget waited patiently for their turns.

"Come on, Maureen." the holographic physical therapist coaxed. Maureen was practicing walking without her crutches, and the therapist had her arms around her waist, supporting her if she fell. Everybody's name, disability, and therapy history had been programmed into the hologram's database, so that she would know exactly which exercises to assign to each crewmember.

"Come on, Maureen." the hologram said again. "It's okay. You're not going to fall."

"Somehow I don't feel all that safe when a hologram is holding me up." Maureen grumbled, causing her friends to break out in peals of laugher. Leg lifts forgotten, Heather lay on the mat laughing so hard she was gasping for breath. The therapist looked bemused.

"Do you do this often?" The hologram's tone was very matter-of-fact. This only caused the girls to laugh even harder.

"Oh, all the time." Heather gasped out between gales of laughter.

"Trust me, you'll get used to us after awhile." Kathleen added, tears of laughter streaming down her face. "They all have before." The therapist didn't look so sure.

"Are you going to just sit there or actually do some exercises?" the hologram inquired. Heather wasn't sure she would ever stop laughing.

"Computer, end program!" ordered Bridget, by way of an answer. The scene abruptly turned into the familiar graph-like landscape of the holosuite. Laughter echoed off the checkered walls. It was only when she had finally regained control of herself that Heather remembered her strange conversation earlier that day with Meagan McCormick. After her friends had calmed down, she told them about it.

"It's strange that I didn't know her." Heather concluded as they exited the holosuite. "I've met almost all the crewmen on board at least once. Why didn't I meet her? And why is she on an almost-all disabled starship? I would've known if she was somebody's relative." Nobody answered her for a few minutes. Then, slowly, three heads turned to look at Kathleen.

"What?!" cried Kathleen overdramatically. "Why are you all looking at me?" Maureen rolled her eyes, one of the few officers on board the _Ability_ with enough coordination to do so.

"_You're_ the captain." she pointed out. "You're supposed to know your officers." Kathleen sighed.

"All right." she told them. "I don't know all that much about her, but I can tell you that she didn't want to go on this mission. She was forced into it by her parents, who thought it would be good for her. She's from the South, which explains why we didn't know her before. And as for your second question, she's not as able-bodied as you might think. She had leukemia when she was sixteen, only three years ago." An awkward silence followed this announcement.

"Leukemia...wow." Heather finally said. "That's rough. But that doesn't explain why she seemed so...I don't know. Strange, maybe? I just didn't get good vibes from her."

"Well it's a big ship," Bridget pointed out. "You might not have to run into her again if you don't want to."

"That's true," Heather agreed. "I'm sure I won't see her again." And, with that settled, Heather resolved to forget about Cadet Meagan McCormick once and for all.

A/N: Sorry I didn't update before. I had only one reviewer, and I wasn't quite sure where I wanted to go with this story. Still not sure. So...tell me what you think! Review!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The next morning, the four senior officers of the _Ability_ met on the bridge to discuss the ship, the mission, and the crew. Kathleen had called it, wanting to catch up with her friends. They had all been so busy since they came on board, they had barely any time to say hello to each other, let alone have a real conversation.

"So, what's up, Kat?" asked Maureen, the quietest of the four. "Why'd you call this meeting?"

"Well, I called this meeting-" Kathleen started.

"Bridget!" Heather interrupted. "Don't put your feet up on the console!" Bridget offered a sheepish smile and took her feet down.

"Sorry." she apologized.

"Jeez, Bridge, this is a starship, not your living room!" Heather grumbled. Of course, Bridget had grown up with five younger brothers who had wrecked the house on a daily basis. Order and neatness were not exactly Bridget's virtues. The girls all laughed and that somehow broke the formal atmosphere of the whole thing.

"Anyway," Kathleen continued. "I called this meeting to just...talk, I guess. We're the senior officers. We should discuss the ship and stuff, shouldn't we?" None of them was really sure. They had all received Starfleet training, of course, but very little. None of them quite expected that they would be on a starship someday. They were some of the first disabled people in space. They were pioneers.

"Wait a second." Heather said. "Shouldn't we be having this meeting with the whole crew? None of us knows what we're getting into here. In fact, we're probably the four people on this ship who know the _most_ about what we're getting into."

Everybody agreed. And so that afternoon, the entire crew of the _Ability_ gathered in the mess hall, the only place on board big enough to hold the entire crew at one time.

_We certainly are a strange collection of crewmembers_, Heather thought, looking over the sea of wheelchairs, crutches, and the occasional assistance dog. Most of the crew had known each other for ages; the few who hadn't must feel so left out.

_Like Meagan McCormick_, a sly little voice nudged its way into Heather's head.

"Stop it." Heather muttered aloud through gritted teeth. She didn't want to think about the mysterious cadet. Heather couldn't put her finger on it, but something about Meagan made her uneasy.

Once everybody was assembled, Kathleen began to speak.

"Well, uh, hi, everybody." she said uncomfortably. She knew that she shouldn't be uncomfortable. Starfleet captains were never uncomfortable in front of their crew. It was an unwritten rule. But like it or not, she was uncomfortable, and a little scared of this prestigious position.

"I've gathered you all here today just to, uh, kinda get to know each other. I know most of you have known each other for years, but there are some new people here, and I want you to embrace them with the same love and respect that you would give to any other crew member of this ship."

"Starfleet threw us all together here, and I can bet you anything they're thinking we can't do it." Kathleen went on, growing more sure of herself. "They're thinking they made a mistake, throwing all us crips together at once on a starship. They're thinking of contacting us right now and ordering us to come home immediately. Well, I can tell you, those Starfleet people back home, they're wrong, you hear me? We can do this, guys. We _can_, and we _will_! We'll show those skeptics out there that we are a strong and capable crew, just as powerful as any starship crew before us. We can, and we will, handle anything that comes our way with confidence and strength. We are the starship _Ability_, damn it, and don't any of you EVER forget it!" Swept up in the moment, Kathleen was yelling by the end. Those who had the coordination to applaud did, and those who didn't roared their approval. When Kathleen turned back to her friends, she was met with three identical faces of shock and awe.

Heather was the first to speak. "Wow, Kat." was all she could manage. As the four friends stared at the mass of crewmembers, all four of them felt something. It was a feeling they used to get every summer, right before camp started. It was sort of a buzzing excitement, starting in the pit of the stomach, and spreading up and down until it had engulfed your whole body. It was anticipation for the future.

As they left the mess hall, Kathleen turned to Heather.

"Hey, Heath." she said. "Could you do me a favor?"

"Sure." Heather agreed. "No prob." Kat regarded her best friend for a moment before blurting it all out in a rush of words.

"I've been getting complaints from half the crew that Meagan McCormick is slacking off, not doing her job, not cooperating with the other crewmembers, etcetera. I want you to go talk to her."

Momentarily stunned, it took awhile for Heather to regain her composure.

"Me?" she cried. "Why me?" The last thing she wanted to do was to talk to Meagan McCormick. Kathleen shrugged.

"You're the only one out of the four of us who's met her. It would be better for her to talk to someone she's already met, rather than a stranger." Heather considered this for a minute.

"Okay." she finally agreed. "But _only_ for you." So she headed off, alone, towards Meagan's quarters. She rang the door chime twice, and was just about to ring it again when a soft voice could be heard from within.

"Come in." Heather entered and looked around. Meagan's quarters were set up similarly to everyone else's, with the bed against one wall and the computer desk against another. An open laptop sat on the desk, displaying a brightly colored desktop. Meagan lay on the bed, sprawled out on her stomach, looking at a photo in a frame. She looked up when she heard the door slide shut.

"Oh. It's you." she said coldly. Heather gulped. What the hell had she gotten herself into?

"I...I don't think...you should speak to your superior in that way..." Heather began cautiously. _Oh great, I sound like a wimp_. Deftly, Megan pushed herself off her stomach and stood in front of her bed, eyes blazing.

"Oh yeah? Well, get this, _I don't care_! I don't care about your stupid rules and regulations, I don't care about this ship, and hell will freeze over before I care about any of this crew. Wanna throw me in the brig? Go right ahead. _I don't care_. I've had a lot of shitty things happen to me in my life, and I don't need you making things worse by flaunting your superiority in my face. So get out of my quarters. Right. Now." Heather's legs were trembling and she leaned hard on her crutch to keep her legs from doing a jig right out from under her.

"Like what?" Heather challenged. Meagan took a step towards her, ready to fight, Heather guessed.

"Like leukemia?" As soon as the words left her mouth, Heather regretted them. Meagan went pale and took a step back, as if someone had punched her in the stomach. When she spoke, it was in jerky fragments.

"Get out. _NOW!!!_" she screeched, then, without warning, she seized the picture frame from the bed and hurled at Heather. Miraculously, Heather dodged just in time, and the frame shattered at her feet. The photo lay amidst the broken glass, and Heather carefully picked it out with two fingers. The photo showed two girls, both bald, although one was starting to grow red fuzz. The two girls had their arms around each other. One had green eyes, the other blue. As she looked closer, Heather realized that she'd recognize those green eyes anywhere. They were staring at her right now. Slowly, she lowered the photo to look at Meagan, who was shaking, whether with fear, rage, or something else, Heather didn't know.

"Who was she?" Heather asked quietly. For the first time, Heather noticed a tear rolling down the young cadet's cheek. Defeated, Meagan flopped back onto the bed.

"All right. Ya wanna know? I'll tell ya." Meagan's slight Southern accent was more pronounced as she went on.

"Her name was Kelly. I met her the first day I was in the hospital, the first day I heard the word cancer. She was my roommate in the cancer ward. She had leukemia, same as me. Before it all fell out, she had beautiful long blonde hair. We became the best of friends, frick and frack, ya know? We never did anything in the hospital apart after that. The nurses started calling us PB&J, we were so tight. Like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. We had our chemo treatments arranged so that we'd have 'em at the same time. Afterwards, we'd be sick at the same time. We had a communal basin that we threw up in. We traded CDs, books, and just talked about life. We both wondered why cancer had to happen to us. It was strange, 'cause Kelly told me she was a bit of an outcast in her high school, even before leukemia. I was pretty, popular, and a cheerleader. That all changed when I got sick. Funny how cancer can bring you together with some people you would have never liked before." Meagan took a deep, shuddering breath before continuing.

"That photo was taken the day I was discharged from the hospital, the day I went into remission. Kelly was supposed to be discharged a week later. They thought she'd achieved remission, too." Meagan's voice was bitter. "She never made it out. The day after I left, she went out of remission, got really sick. Within two weeks, she was dead."

"I became a completely different person after Kelly died. I was once fun, bubbly, energetic. Before I got sick, I was hoping to be head cheerleader. When I went back to school, it was like nobody remembered the old Meagan anymore. Everybody was too scared of cancer to have anything to do with me. There were a few of my old friends who tried, but they didn't really understand. I guess I pushed them away. I thought the only person who could truly understand me was Kelly. Maybe I was wrong. I don't know." By this time Meagan was full out sobbing. For the first time, Heather saw Meagan McCormick, not as a nuisance or a problem or mystery. She saw Meagan as a frightened, lonely, confused young girl, barely out of the turbulence of adolescence. Heather joined Meagan on the bed and put her arm around the crying girl.

"And so you joined Starfleet." Heather prompted gently. Meagan nodded.

"And so I joined Starfleet. I didn't want to go to college, be with more people who wouldn't understand me, wouldn't accept me. I had nowhere else to turn. I thought Starfleet sounded cool, so I joined." Meagan swiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. "Never thought I'd end up here, with a bunch of crips." Heather's heart ached for the girl. She understood Meagan's isolation all too well. After she had gone to her first year of camp between 7th and 8th grades, she too had become a different person. She had isolated herself from non-disabled people during high school and ended up making things a lot harder for herself.

"Meagan, it's okay. It's okay." she comforted. Suddenly her combadge beeped.

"Dines to Martinez"

"Martinez here."

"Heath, we need you on the bridge." Heather looked at Meagan before responding. The girl's sobs had eased, but she was still trembling and silent tears still poured down her face.

"On my way." Heather said, a little reluctantly, and then, to Meagan: "You gonna be ok?" Meagan nodded silently.

"Go ahead. They need you." And so Heather left, feeling that while she might not have fully solved the Meagan problem, at least she knew the story behind it.

A/N: My muse completely left me. I am so sorry. It took an extended vacation without informing me. But I think-not sure-but I think it's back now. Read and review please!!!


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